I don't think I'm gonna do this, I've changed my mind.
You can't change your mind.
Don't you understand that? Didn't you already tell those guys up there
tomorrow there's no collections?
You're in now, that's it, so get used to it, relax.
-Take it easy. -I could find an explanation for that.
-You could? -I can't go through with this.
You think about that for a second.
You're going to have everything you've wanted your whole life.
No more of this bullshit 9:00 to 5:00.
You've got it made now.
Just relax and do what I tell you.
We're gonna be there, we're gonna be there beautiful.
We're gonna sit there on that island.
-We're gonna lie in the sun. -All right, never mind.
-We'll have everything. -Let's get to business.
-Have you got the list? -I got the list.
-Okay, gimme the list. -I don't know.
-What do you mean you don't know? Come on, now. -I'm scared.
-They're going to see a strange person doing it. -Jesus, you gotta be nuts.
I don't know if the code word is enough.
-You're not scared? -The code word's enough. I don't give a shit.
I walk in, I say, "Boom, boom, boom,"
I take the money, and that's it.
-Okay, don't make this conspicuous. -Who's conspicuous?
I'm walkin' easy. Okay, I got it.
You got every single mark down there?
-Thirty-six of them? One, two to 36, right? -Yeah.
-Okay? Location's down, everything's perfect? -Right.
-You've got every address for me? -Right. Right.
-Okay. Could you-- -Now remember one thing:
After the code word, they may double check you
-and ask you something else. -Mm-hmm.
When they ask you something else beyond what they are supposed to,
the answer's "pumpernickel" to that.
-Pumpernickel? -That's right.
-Who the fuc-- -I went through this with you!
I'm getting scared. You don't remember now?
-I remember everything. I don't forget. -You can't make a slip-up.
Look at me! Look at me!
Pumpernickel, how's that? Nice?
But only-- only if they ask you questions
after you've satisfied all the requirements about the code.
-Don't volunteer it otherwise. -I gotcha.
Just take it easy.
The only thing you've gotta do is just relax.
I've arranged for the plane--
Is it coming for sure at noon on Friday?
-Of course it's coming for sure! -Nothing could be wrong with that?
-Nothing could be wrong. -And the car's waiting on the other end?
The limo is sitting there, everything is set. We've got everything done.
You think anybody knows about the garage where we're hidden?
Nobody knows anything. Everything I've ever done my whole life worked smooth.
What's the matter with you? Just relax.
This is the chance of a lifetime.
(jazz music plays)
(knocking)
(buzzer)
Man: Hi, Simon.
How's it going?
On the dot as usual, Carmine.
Listen, Carmine, I've got some news for you
I don't think you'll mind.
There're no collections tomorrow.
They've been called off for tomorrow.
Just for the day, on Thursday collections as usual.
No collections?
There's a big game, the Yankees-Red Sox.
Sure, that's why we'll have a big collection
on Thursday to make up for it.
The DA's men apparently have been alerted,
they're going to be in the field there, and so just a day after
the big game they're going to be surprised
-nothing will be happening at all. -Hmm.
And I'm not supposed to tell you this but there's a bonus for you guys.
So you can enjoy yourself tomorrow, take the day off.
That's okay with me. I'll bet you don't take the day off.
Simon of the books, always working.
Well, I like to sit here and do my bookkeeping,
you know? I like my figures.
You like to work with figures, I like money.
(chuckles) The actual money, to me is an abstraction.
I like to work with it, I like everything to add up right.
-I like to work with it and spend it. -Okay, now...
sign it, take a copy for yourself as usual
-and give me a copy. -Okay.
Make sure the carbon is covering it.
Okay.
I'll keep this, you keep that one.
-Okay. -No, this one is mine. I keep that.
I'm gonna go away.
Again?
Yes, well, this time I'm going to a place further away,
but I'll be back as soon as I can. I promise.
I got a lot of money for you.
By the way, I want to tell you that there are not gonna be any collections tomorrow.
You can take the day off tomorrow
and then resume Thursday as usual.
Why?
Some kind of a tip-off that
the DA's men are going to be out expecting something.
Thursday we'll resume as usual.
So, as far as you're concerned,
the commission you get, it will be just the same because Thursday
the collections will be bigger to make up for it.
-And in addition to that-- -Why didn't you tell me about this earlier?
You're going to collect the same amount on Thursday as you would have if you'd gone
both Wednesday and Thursday, you're getting the same amount of money,
you're getting the same commission, you're getting a day off
and in addition to that you're getting a bonus also.
Bad day today.
Well, we'll see how much we've got here.
It varies from day to day.
The collections are called off for tomorrow.
I'm gonna-- I'm gonna come back, and I'm gonna
give us things that we never had before.
I'm gonna give us everything in the world.
I'm gonna make magic for us.
-Because you know who I am, don't you? -Yeah.
-I'm the magic man. -(laughs)
(whispers)
(buzzing)
(typewriter clacking)
(phone ringing)
Sid: It's easy. You tell all the collectors
to take Wednesday off,
and I'll pick up the money in their place.
You just relax. Relax.
You sit in the office, you take it easy.
I've got the code words.
They'll think I'm substituting for the collectors.
You stay in the office until 2:10,
then you slip out and meet me in the garage.
It's easy.
Hi, I gotta get the key to the men's room again.
Ah, you're really going there a lot these days, aren't you?
-Well, this stuff I ate for lunch today, I don't know. -Yeah.
I'll try to be back as soon as I can,
-but I don't know so just hold the phone calls for me. -Okay.
(folk music plays)
Just look at it!
$750,000!
And you know what else you got?
-You got this. -What? What's--
-What's this? -You! You are Sidney Becker's chauffeur!
Goddamn, you look like my chauffeur.
You know what the name "Costa Rica" means?
Do you have any idea what "Costa Rica" means?
It means "rich coast," and that's what
we're gonna be: Rich people on a rich coast.
Give me another one.
-Can you give me another one? -I'll give it to you in a moment.
-Give it to me now! I wanna go. -Here, wrap this.
You're a rich man, you act like you're still bored, you know that?
Come on, will you? We're almost finished.
Okay. All right, okay.
I just have to make one computation here.
Okay, that's it.
Okay, here we are, the last packages.
96 packages with $7,500 each.
That's after the four little packages
I gave you of $1,080 each.
We have $724,360 not $750,000.
What's the difference? When you're rich you're rich.
(folk music plays)
Sid: Mobile number 77520.
Yes, I want to call 212-734-1892.
Hi, baby. Sid. Two games, I want.
I want Pittsburgh, and I want Minnesota.
I'll take the points on the first,
and I'll give on the second, okay?
I'll talk to you soon because I'm kind of on the road.
I'm in my car, all right?
I love you too, bye-bye.
I'm very hot. Let's stop at the next motel.
What do you mean you're hot? What are you hot about?
Man, I'm hot. My whole body's hot, it's crying out.
So, your air conditioning isn't working in this stupid car of yours.
Open up the windows, I asked you.
* I'm so rich and happy *
The idea of how rich I am makes me so hot.
I need a woman. I need two women!
Oh, women you need, huh?
When we get where we're going, you can have your women.
Who gives a shit? We don't have to be there anyway 'til Monday morning.
-Monday morning? -Monday morning.
-Since when is it Monday? -The plane's not coming til Monday morning.
What are you, crazy? How come you changed the arrangement?
Because the guy had a little problem, I said okay.
What do you want me to do? Tell him no, not do a thing?
You swore to me that it would be on Friday!
We would drive straight through, get out of here!
Why did you change? Why did you let me go through with this?
You're a rich man, why don't you enjoy it?
How'd I get into this thing with a crazy guy like you?
What's the matter with you? We're gonna get killed!
Don't you understand what you've done to us here?
-What do you mean Monday? -When you drive the car?
We're gonna get killed if you drive like that!
I don't care about getting killed driving like that! I'm accident prone anyway!
That's probably how I got into this thing with you, because of that suicidal urge!
Change the arrangement back! Get the plane Friday.
It's your responsibility, because if anybody gets killed
you're gonna get killed for this!
I'm hot, I'm hot, I'm oh so very hot.
Only a moron like you could talk about women now!
I wanna have some lady in a tent tonight.
-Oh, my God. -Will you pull over to the side of the road, please?
I can't believe that we're stopping here. We just started going, and we're stopping here.
The whole thing I just can't believe it.
Three days later, and you tell me afterwards.
It's just unbelievable. Everything was wrong to begin with,
and now you pull this on me.
It's ridiculous.
(organ music plays)
Don't you understand, if we sit in this room then we look guilty?
-Oh, my God, you're impossible. -Then we look like something's wrong?
-Why don't you get yourself-- -Well, I'm not that stupid not to be afraid
in the situation of what we've done, and if you weren't a complete idiot and moron
and obsessed with the money you've got, you'd realize what danger we're in.
We've got three days more and these are
professional criminals and this is a huge organization.
-Oh, stop your stupidity. I really feel like slapping you. -Will you relax?
Would you listen to me for a second.
Understand what I'm doing here.
You know why I'm doing this? For you, for me!
This is what we should do.
Go down to the bar, relax, be natural.
What do you wanna be, two assholes in a room?
I'm gonna take you to the bar now
and just try to look normal.
You're not going to the bar.
We agreed that we're staying in this room.
I've been in this room three hours and I've had it, okay?
-You're staying in this room. -I wanna get out of the room.
You're making yourself pretty for yourself
because you're not going anywhere.
So just stay here.
Here we are in the existential realm?
Yes, this-- we call this existential,
that is to say one works out
of what it is to be a person.
So for Buber, there is what you might call
talking about something,
that's talking about ideas?
-Yes. About is always an idea. -Man: Then there is talking to someone.
-Yes. -Man: Uh...
So that, as far as Buber was concerned--
now tell me whether you agree with this-- it's really
almost illegitimate to talk about God.
The only thing legitimate is talking to God, and that's prayer.
Yes, that's quite right,
except one does very interesting things.
Okay, now it's your turn to drive.
I'm pulling up at the next gas station there,
and we're gonna change places.
I'm gonna sit in the back.
You can put on the chauffeur's cap and drive.
(indistinct chattering)
How you doing?
-Fine, good. -That's a great car, you know?
Let me ask you this, do you get good bread for driving that Turkey?
You think I'm a driver?
Do I look like a driver to you?
What's the matter with you? It's my car, I own the car.
-Oh, you own the car. -That's right.
The guy in the back seat drives the car most of the time.
He's a friend of mine. He just got tired, he can't take it.
So I figured I'd put on the hat and drive a little bit, that's all, for fun.
-Is it fun? -I don't happen to like to drive.
I have a whole staff back where I live.
I have a driver full time, I have a butler. I have a number of things. Yeah.
I don't drive anybody's car. It's my own car. Okay?
You need a driver then, right?
I should have a driver. I should have a lot of things,
but I happen to be on the road a second.
-Why? You know how to drive? -Yeah!
You live here in this town?
Well, yeah, kinda.
Yeah? You wanna get out of here?
Where are you going? Where do you live?
I tell you what, you want to make some bread?
How much bread?
-A lot of money. -What's "A lot of money"?
How'd you like to-- How'd you like to change your whole life, mister?
(scatting)
-(inaudible) -Takes a lot of bread to make it, you know, as a singer.
My God, a lot of bread.
But I got the pipes for it. I swear I got the pipes.
One of these days they'll probably insure my pipes
for like a million dollars.
Wouldn't that be fun?
Making payment on your pipes? (chuckles)
What, are you crazy, bringing another person along with us?
-You're endangering what we're-- -Are you crazy? Do you think
anybody's gonna look at a $1,000-a-day chauffeur, two guys with classy looking--
$1,000 a day? What do you mean?
-I gave him 4,000. I told you. -You gave him 4,000 to drive?
I gave him 1,000 down, I'll give him 3,000 when we get there.
Are you completely crazy, spending our money like that? I'm not giving him anything.
You know what 4,000 is to me? I spit on 4,000.
You spit on that? Then spit on your own, in that case.
-You pay for it. How is that? -Fine, I'll pay for it.
Oh, okay, in that case. But I still think it was a stupid thing to bring him along.
But I don't. I like it.
This is the greatest front you could ever have in your life.
-What a front this is, don't you understand that? -I don't know about that at all.
Well, you've done it now, okay.
Just be careful what you talk to him.
Don't drink. Don't tell him anything.
I'm not gonna drink once on the whole trip, I promise you that.
-Okay? -Okay.
A lot of bread to make it in show business. Just for costumes.
You know how much-- I mean, just for costumes.
You have to have everything special made. I mean, you know what I mean?
You're gonna have... (blubbers)
This is where you want to go?
Shoes? You know, I mean, you can't have one pair of shoes.
Simon: Don't forget, Moose, when you pull up to let me have the key to the car.
I always want to have the keys to the car whenever we stop driving.
Moose: Okay, we're home.
(crowd cheering on TV)
(game announcers speaking on TV)
Wait a minute.
You know, I was just next door.
I mean, I can't believe this. Okay, you're a big shot so you took another room--
-Shh! -Wait a minute. You took another room for yourself.
You've got a room there with two beds. You've got two rooms and four beds?
-What's the idea? -What do you care what I have?
-Who are you calling, then? Who are you calling? -Yes. Room 111.
-Who are you calling? -Would you shut up for a second?
No, no. I'm worried about your behavior. Who are you calling?
(announcers speak indistinctly)
Hiya, Sammy. Sid Becker, how are you?
Listen, I want to get an early line on two things.
I want Denver, and I want to know about Seattle.
Okay, Denver, I'm gonna give the points.
Seattle, I'm gonna take the points.
Do you know you still owe me $13
from a shared dinner which you haven't paid me from six months ago?
Okay, now, on Seattle, I want it twice,
and-- and Denver, I want four times.
Okay, babe. Thank you very much.
-I'll talk to you, buh-bye. -Okay, what are you doing?
You're gambling again? Who did you call?
-This is the best bet I ever made. -Do they know where you are?
How can they know where I am? Did I tell them where I was?
I called. I charged it to the room.
How are you going to collect your money when you win the bet?
I'm not gonna collect the money. I'm not collecting it. I never win,
so I'm not going to pay for the first time
'cause I'm gonna be in Costa Rica!
This is the first time in my life
that if I lose, I win because--
(knocking)
Wh...
(deep voice) Who is it?
-I'm gonna go see. -Don't see. (deep voice) Who is it?
What are you guys doing here?
-What are you doing here, Moose? -I'm going out to the pool,
if you need anything. You need anything?
Well, I met a guy who's got a six-string ukulele.
I'll see you at the pool, all right?
I don't like this.
Why's he going to the pool? He's not supposed to go to the pool.
He's not supposed to go swimming? I don't understand.
He's gotta have a reason for going to the pool.
-Make your arrangements with him. -Arrangements?
-Yeah. You're the guy who hired him. -I don't like it.
I'm telling you, for the first time, I don't like it.
Huh, I didn't like it to begin with.
(acoustic music playing)
(Moose scatting)
Woman: Over and over. And up.
Then split your legs.
Yeah, I can't nearly split my legs as far as you.
That's what I was watching in the first place.
-Simon: Show me another one that you do. -How about a yoga exercise?
-Simon: Sure. -Okay. It's called a spinal twist.
Sit like this.
Cross one leg, put your arm through like this.
What? You put your arm through like this?
My hands don't reach.
Okay, just reach as far as you can. Look back there.
Sit up straight. Sit up straight.
Come here, pull my hands together. Pull my hands together.
-Make my hands touch. -There you go.
-Aah! -See. Don't hurt yourself.
-You're not supposed to strain. -That's pretty good for me.
Oh, in fact that stand you were doing before,
I can do it this way, like...
-Yeah. -The thing is that I'm always jealous
of the physical abilities some people have, I don't.
Of course, I have them in other directions
and some are even contradictory to the others,
but I try to get a maximum of each without losing some of the other.
(Moose scatting)
-Are you okay? -The ground's a little bit rough there.
Oh, there's...
-My name's Jenny. -I'm Simon.
(Moose scatting)
-Burning. -I'll put lotion on you.
Baby? I'm burning.
-I'm a little burned. -(splashing)
-I'll put lotion on you. -Well, can't we go in the shade?
Let's put some lotion on first.
Where's your hat?
-You don't have it out here? -Yeah. That's a good idea.
Put your hat on.
(Moose continues scatting)
Sid: I watched you, by the way, at the pool today
and I must say that you not only did the exercises, but you have a very beautiful body.
Jenny: Thank you.
And me, I hope in all respects, is a compliment.
-Oh, that's very nice. -Oh, no, I love people noticing her body.
-I notice it a lot. -Yeah. I mean, I wasn't leering at it,
-but I couldn't help but notice. -You can leer at it, a little. That's all right.
You can't do anything but leer. Even when you don't leer you leer.
(Jenny laughs)
-What's happening, man? -What's happening?
-That was great today by the pool. -Yeah, it was fun.
-This is Carol. -Hi, Carol.
-Carol, this is Moose. -How are you? Joe Mastaki.
-Moose plays the guitar and writes songs. -Uh-huh.
Um... Excuse me, what is that that you're taking?
That's one of my general collection of vitamins.
This one's called pangamic acid.
That's actually vitamin B-15.
Oh, do you know what? I didn't even know that there was a 15.
I knew there was a B1, but...
-Do you know something about vitamins? -Well, I know a little.
Yeah, well, even if you knew a lot, don't be surprised you don't know about 15,
because to being with, in the United States it's not even recognized as a vitamin.
-It's a drug? -No, it's certainly not a drug.
-What is it? -Well, the Food and Drugs Admin--
Sid: I can't believe this. Can I get some food?
-Okay, she'll be with you in a moment. -What's going on?
-Anyway, that's-- -Leona, please stop talking to customers.
The gentleman's waiting for his dinner.
Excuse me. I'm sorry.
Just-- I have to go serve this food. I'm sorry.
-I'll just take the pill, 'cause it's good for me. -Okay. (chuckles)
Sid: What's going on? Are you crazy?
-Simon: What'd I do? -Sid: I want my food. I want my beer.
-Simon: You have to interrupt me when I'm having-- -Sid: The woman's working here.
Can't get any food. It took me the whole time to get the beer.
I'm happy with the steak. I got a really rare one.
-Me too. -I got absolutely nothing.
I have your beer. Here you are.
Sid: Great.
I'm driving, uh-- I'm driving these two guys down to Miami.
Wonderful bread, wonderful bread.
I'm not really a driver see, W-what I really am is, you know, is like a writer/singer.
-I mean, and a poet and a philosopher. -Carol: Oh.
-This is a vitamin that's used in Russia. -Oh.
Leona, stop talking to the customers. Go back to your station right now.
-What did you do? -Nothing, she just asked me about my vitamins.
You, um-- do you really think I should--
I guess I should stop talking to the customers.
-That's right. -You're absolutely right.
Don't you think I should stop talking to the customers?
-I really shouldn't be talking to the customers. -What's going on around here?
I think, I think you should have this.
You are right. I should not talk to people.
I should not be here.
I should sit down and be a person
like everybody else and you all should talk to me.
I certainly don't deserve to be treated with any kind of respect
or any kind of-- or any kind of lovingness
or treated like a human being who deserves-- who-who-who...
I am a person, and I am going to be treated like one.
What's going on?
Everybody's nuts. You know that?
-What's going on? -It's very embarrassing to me to see this kind of--
How's your strength? I'd like to feel some muscles.
You would, huh? Just touch me here.
-Right under here. -Right there?
-Yeah. Feel it? -That's very good.
-Yeah? -Very good. Yeah.
You have a very nice body.
-Very, very attractive-- -I can hardly breathe.
I've never known a man with a mustache before.
Don't you think it's about time you did?
Yeah, I think it is.
(whispering) How close are you to this man over here?
He's a friend.
He makes me a bit uncomfortable.
I'd like to talk to you.
Maybe we can arrange that.
Oh, God, I feel sick.
You're always sick.
Sidney, are you always sick?
-Sid: I never get sick. -Jenny: No, you don't.
-You're very healthy. -Oh!
What's going on?
What's the matter with this guy? Are you all right?
(sobbing)
Are you okay? Can I do something for you?
Just relax, take it easy.
Jesus.
-You know, Sidney, I don't know what-- -(shushing)
I don't know what the hell you're doing.
-What are you doing-- -What did I say to her?
-The girl was coming on to me. -Do you think we have enough trouble without causing things?
You and your stupid approaches to women.
Hey, listen, man. I'm going to the bar,
I'm having a drink, I'm going to sleep, that's it.
Just don't get yourself into any more trouble in the bar there.
-Oh, brother. -Hello.
I wanted to apologize 'cause
I think I might have made you feel a little badly.
I have school.
College?
High school.
Senior. I'm seventeen.
(Moose and Carol chuckle)
Oh, my God.
-Be careful, just a baby here. -Yeah.
You mind if I sit down?
No.
You should try one of these. I think it'll make you feel better.
I can't drink. It makes me too sick.
That bastard.
He left me here completely stranded.
(sobbing) I don't have any money.
I don't have any way to get out of here.
He didn't pay the bill.
Listen, he'll probably come back, first of all.
He's not gonna come back. I know him. He won't come back.
The second thing is, you don't have to worry about any money.
Let me tell you that. I happen to have a lot of money.
I'm serious.
Do you know what I'm doing walking around here?
I've been doing one thing. I've been looking for you.
-Get yourself a chair. Sit down, babe. -I've been worried about you.
-How you doing, Sid? How you doing? -You're so nice.
-I'm so really concerned about you. -Thank you.
-What's the result of this? -I quit my job.
You quit? Just for the moment or you really quit?
I quit, but I want you to know that just because
you were here when it happened, I didn't want
you to feel that you were to blame for it.
I'm going from here to the most beautiful place in the whole country.
-Where are you going? -Miami Beach, Florida.
I don't have the temperament to work as a waitress.
I just do not have the temperament to work as a waitress.
I have outside in the parking lot
-a limousine which is my limousine. -Your limousine?
That's right. It's hard to believe, right?
I just walk around, I look like another guy.
What are you doing?
I'm gonna get some shampoo.
-Oh, out of this machine? -Yeah.
Where are you going?
I dunno. Home, I guess. You know.
You are gonna fall desperately in love with me.
It's hard to believe, right?
You're gonna love me and hold me
and you'll kiss me.
No strings attached.
Well, listen, I was just going to my room
to watch a little television.
Do you want to join me?
Just to watch a little television?
-I love you. -Oh, stop.
I love you. I swear on my life.
I love you more than I love myself.
I want you so much close to me.
And take your time. I don't care how long it takes.
You're with somebody for the first time.
I can take complete care of you.
Anything you want.
I'm not kidding. I'm so serious.
I want you so badly.
* Day will break, and I'll awake *
* To start to bake a sugar cake *
* For you to take to all the boys to see *
Both: * We will raise a family
Man: * A boy for you...
I can't figure it out.
I just can't figure it out. Every time when you're watching television
everything just always works out beautifully
or if there're problems, they know how to solve the problems.
Everybody knows how to take care of themselves
and make a living or feed themselves or--
or there's a point to it all if they don't.
Simon: You know that guy, Sidney, who's with me?
We're going on some kind of a trip and, um...
maybe you can just come along. Maybe you ought to come along with us on the trip.
What do you think of that? Maybe you ought to come with us
since you don't kind of, like-- you don't know exactly what you're doing here.
-What do you think of the idea? -I would love to get away from here.
I can't tell you how much I'd love to get away from here.
But I don't want to lead you on and if we go to a trip--
on a trip together, then for sure you'll be
expecting to have some sort of, like-- like,
sex or, you know, that kind of thing.
It's very strange that I'm inviting you along.
If I like you, I'll feel like having sex with you,
but I'll only feel like having sex with you
if you feel like having sex with me,
so as long as you feel that that's not something
you want to do, you certainly don't have to worry about me
trying to impose it on you or anything like that.
Certainly it's up to you. It's nothing to do with it.
That's not a condition of your coming or anything.
There are things about me that are so good,
and so valuable, and I can't find a place for them. You know what I mean?
It's like I'm totally wasted in this whole environment.
Just come with us. Just come with us, and we'll see what happens.
Yeah. I-- I wanna go with you.
I just want to show you this. I've got enough vitamins for both of us.
Take a look at this. You see?
And even though I take rather sizable amounts of vitamins,
and I'm a little bit stingy about my vitamins,
I have plenty here that I can share with you for the trip.
(metal clanking)
Aaaugh!
It's me, man! It's me!
Don't you see it's me?
You crazy drunk bastard, I can smell you--
-What do you mean "drunk"? -Shut up!
-What the hell are you doin' here? -I want some money.
I gotta get some fucking money out.
First of all, we agreed not to touch the money 'til we get there.
Secondly, you must be crazy.
Here, in the hotel, anybody could walk out and see you. Thirdly--
-But I need some money now. Do-- -Shut up and listen.
Thirdly, you're so drunk. You couldn--
I never had any drinks tonight.
-Okay. You couldn't get the money with a crowbar. -I had two drinks.
You have to raise the wheels, you have to take 'em off.
-You need the machine to take it out. -I want fucking money.
-You can't get any money. -Then get out!
Shut up or I'm gonna take the car and go myself now, you understand that?
-Shut up now. -Oh, Jesus Christ.
Don't ever touch those tires again because they belong to me, you understand that?
Two of the tires are mine and two are yours.
-I can't function without cash! -(shushing)
-I need cash! -Keep your voice down, or I'm gonna choke you out.
You can't touch that money. You couldn't get it that way anyway.
Use your credit cards if you need to spend money.
Use those credit cards that you've always been showing off.
-What a great idea. -(shushing)
-You know something? -Quiet.
-You know, you're right. -Quiet.
-Don't choke me! -I'm gonna choke--
-For the first time you're right. -Yes, just keep quiet.
Because I don't give a shit if I pay them or not
-'cause I'm going to Costa Rica... -Shut up.
-...and I don't give a shit about-- -Shut up!
(engine idling)
Leona: It's very strange going on this trip
with the three-- four people that I don't really even know.
And I have never been in a limousine before.
This is very odd.
Every single time I've ever seen a limousine or a Cadillac
or something like that, I have always felt that,
um, those people had something
that they shouldn't be having.
Every single time I see a Cadillac
I have this awful urge to hit it.
And I am a very nice person. I just can't
understand how people can take up so much space
on the road and spend so much money on a car
when other people don't have anything.
Have you noticed people have been really hostile to you
since you've been in this car?
-Hostile to me? -People get very angry at people who have a lot of things.
Does anybody know where we're going? Does anybody know what road I should be taking?
Do I just drive where the sun-- I mean, I just follow south, right?
I've never really known how to start.
It's really been my problem. Do you know what I mean?
I mean, some guys, I guess they just know where to be to start,
and-and-- but I never did.
I'm trying to write the great American song.
If you can write one great... (chuckles)
Just one great American song, then--
I mean, then you don't have to worry about it the rest of your life.
You know what I mean?
* Just like a breeze blowing your hair *
* Flying you this way, set you down there *
* Ain't got me a worry, ain't got no care *
Both: * Oh, yeah
Moose: Take it.
* Bom-bom
Jenny: * Just like a hound dog asleep in the shade *
* Just like a clown in a small town parade *
It's great. It's great.
* I got a feelin' that I got it made *
* Oh, yeah, sunny side up *
Okay, I'll buy that.
* Just like a tingle deep down in your toes *
* Just like a fire whose flame slowly grows *
* I got the ro-deo-dos
Both: * Mmm-mmm, sunny side up *
(scatting)
* Just like a penny in a poor man's hand *
* Fifteen arms in a one-man band *
* I found my promised land *
* Mmm-mmm
(Moose vocalizing)
(fingers snapping)
Sid! You do one, Sid!
-(off-key) * Mm-mmm -(all laugh)
* Look at me drivin' now
* Mmm-mmm, I'm drivin' now*
* Oh yes, Mother, look at me, I'm rich *
* I'm just as rich as I can be *
* I fee like... (scatting)
* I do, mister, I'm a rich, rich man *
-* I'm so rich, so doggone bloody rich * -(Jenny vocalizes off-key)
* 'Cause I am the king of this here road *
Moose and Jenny: * Mmm-mmm
(Moose scatting)
(Jenny joins in)
I might go to the room with you,
and I might not.
But before I make a decision like that,
I have to know something about you. I don't even know you.
What do you want to know?
What are you going to do in Miami?
What do you do for a living?
Why are you traveling on the road like this?
-Who is your friend? -Wow, that's a lot of questions.
I'm a deal maker.
-I make all kinds of deals. -What kinds of deals?
Simon: Leona? Leona?
-(Leona exclaiming) -Take it easy, it's Simon, it's Simon.
Don't get excited. It's me.
-(Leona sighs) -I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.
But I came by and, you know, your door was open.
-I wanted to see, but your door was. -(mumbles)
But, you know, it's not a good idea--
I'm sorry I scared you but it's not a good idea to just have your door open.
-Someone else could have come in. -Oh, no.
I didn't know it was open.
-Uh, what do you want? -Oh.
I'm sorry now, but I just thought maybe you would be up
and I wanted to talk or just visit a little bit.
Um, I'm-- I'm asleep.
Yeah, I saw that your TV was on.
Yeah, but I just have it on for company.
(chuckles) Maybe I can't compete with a TV,
but I'm sort of a company myself.
What's the next question?
What are you going to do in Miami?
-I have a particular thing to do with some grain down there. -Um-hmm.
-Buying and selling some grain. -I see.
-Are you feeling okay now? You're not scared or anything? -No, no.
How come you sleep with the door open? I mean, what kind of a thing is that?
-I know. I forgot to lock it. -What, you did it by accident?
Yes. Sometimes I forget that.
I came by slowly trying to determine if you were up or not,
I saw some kind of flickering light,
then I was amazed that the door's open,
and, like, that's a very strange person like me coming in for a visit.
-And you want me to come to your room, huh? -Desperately.
What for?
To be with you, to put my hands on you,
to-- to touch you.
You want to have sex.
Well, amongst other things. I don't just want to have sex.
I want to talk to you.
We can talk here too.
But we can't touch here.
Sure, we can touch. This is a touch.
But we can't-- we can't feel each other underneath our clothes.
-That's true. -Okay.
That may be one of the reasons I prefer to stay here.
It is very important that you understand that
I cannot and I will not be in a situation in my life right now
and I don't think ever again where I meet someone,
I like them, and I immediately
spend the night with them and have sex with them.
Okay, okay, listen, I want to tell you something,
I want to explain something to you. This is difficult to do. Uh...
The whole thing of a man approaching a woman
and trying to have sex with her all comes
from the fact that society is dominated by men
and men made rules completely perverting
and contrary to what the laws of nature are.
Because women have a much greater sexuality
than men have in every way.
-Simon-- -Please just listen.
Women have a much stronger sex drive.
Their sex drive gets stronger and stronger as men's get weaker.
They have many orgasms during a time, when a man only has one orgasm.
They feel it much more physically, emotionally and everything else.
By every logic, the women should be the one's who are pursuing sex,
whether it's just purely physical, as you said, or emotionally.
(inhales) And men are very afraid of it,
they are very fallible, and it's their sexuality that fails all the time.
To protect themselves from it, they made objects out of women
that they go and get sex out of, that they pay or that they do something or the other with.
That's what the whole thing is.
And that's why I refuse to be part of a situation like that.
You see, I'm really fantastically good at sex.
I'm fantastically good at sex,
because I have all the proper components of being good at it.
When I'm doing it, I'm not doing it to satisfy myself physically.
I'm doing something to share something with a woman and to give a woman
a pleasure, the sense of-- the degree of pleasure that she can have.
I'm doing it not as a physical thing artificially separated from an emotional thing.
From a physical point of view, I do it for any length of time
-for the woman to have endless number of orgasms. -Uh-huh.
I know it sounds crazy if I'm going to explain to you
that I'm the best person in the world at sex.
I can't prove any of this unless you do have sex with me.
What you're talking about is sex,
and what you're talking about is a sexual experience.
What I am talking about is love.
And I don't care how good that one sexual experience is
or two or three or 100.
What I want is someone to love
and someone who will love me and will be
committed to me for a very long time.
It's so goddamn wrong. First of all, listen to me.
What the hell are you doing getting into my bathtub? Are you crazy?
I just can't believe that you would walk in here naked and get in the bathtub with me!
-So what? -Get out of here!
We got no broads, right? And it pisses me off.
-I said-- -I tell you what. Listen to me for a second.
You gotta think to yourself, "We're rich.
We're free for the first time in our life!"
-Let's clean up. -Wash up. Come on. -Get out of here!
Get away from me!
I'm telling you, wash up and feel good!
-You know-- -You're a rich man. Listen to me!
You know who I owe it to? Not to me, to you! You son of a bitch!
-(laughing) -You know something?
-Give me a kiss, you son of a bitch!
I'm gonna-- I'm gonna throw you physically out of here,
except touching you physically has some unfortunate implications.
You get a hooker for 50 bucks.
-Oh, God. -You have no bullshit like this.
This is crazy.
We got everything in the world going for us.
We got money. We could have anything in the world
and you have me sitting in a fuckin' bar alone.
Now will you do what I say this time?
Make a phone call and let's get a couple of broads here.
You're behaving like a deviant.
-A deviant? -That's right.
What, you're worried about me sexually?
I'm not worried, but the whole idea of your getting in the bathtub with me naked.
What the fuck am I supposed to do sitting on a highway with no women?
Want me to do your leg?
(chuckles)
(sighs)
Feel good?
Mm-hmm.
And you?
Okay.
It's better than driving the car.
(both laughing)
(sighs)
How'd you end up with these two guys?
God, I wish I knew.
-What'd she say to you tonight? -I'm telling you--
-What'd she say to you tonight? -About what?
What are you doing here alone?
I'm not discussing my relationship with women with you.
That's a private thing between me and them.
Well, it's pretty obvious you're not with her, are ya?
And it's pretty obvious I'm not--
Of course I'm not with anybody right now,
I'm doing my exercises.
I'm on this trip, I'm not getting my exercises properly,
I'm not even getting proper food. There isn't fresh food.
You know what the best exercise--
It's junk food around here. And I will--
You know what the best exercise is? Fucking.
-Fucking is a very good exercise. -Of course it is.
But from what you've told me about the way you do it,
how can you get the exercise? You do it so briefly.
You have an orgasm so quickly. When you do it--
Where did you hear this shit now? Come on.
Come on. You acknowledged it about yourself.
You always have to restrain yourself from coming.
That's not true. Of course I have to restrain myself from coming.
Don't you have to restrain yourself?
Of course I don't have to restrain myself.
It's a complete natural thing for me to be on a level
very close to coming and keep extending it indefinitely,
because I'm interested in transferring the pleasure to the woman.
So you're just a gentleman driver, huh?
And a poet, philosopher, songwriter...
apache dancer.
Lover.
Receiver of...
(laughing)
...of love from strangers.
I'm not a stranger.
-Not anymore. -Uh-huh.
You know, I'm not going on with this
with your being in the tub with me here.
I don't wanna be in the tub with you here.
I'm gonna start my exercise.
What, you think I wanna do this?
I got no place to go!
(car horn blaring)
Probably not them at all. It's somebody who found out.
Maybe it's your driver. Somebody who found out that we have money.
(screaming) Why is it me? Why not you?
Because I don't talk like you do.
I don't show off money like you do. That's why.
We're gone. We're gone! Look at this thing, will you?
-Get the other door. -Simon: Shut up.
Don't look at the wheels. Don't look at the wheels.
They ripped the fuckin' car apart and took the money!
-That's what they did! -Shut up, damn it.
Jesus Christ! We did all of that shit for nothin'!
-Shut up and listen to me now. -Damn it.
They haven't got the money. They haven't got it.
-How the fuck do you know? -Shut up and listen.
I know how, I put the tires and I checked. They haven't got...
-Don't look there anymore. -How do you know?
Because they may be watching us
and we're alive because they didn't find it.
So don't look there anymore.
Who cares about the car. We're getting...
Yeah, but the money in the car!
We got it. I tell you we got it.
Let's fix up the car and get out of here now.
I wanna see the fucking money now!
-I wanna see-- -You're not seeing anything.
-I must see it! -You're not looking there again.
-Now, let's fix the car up. -Goddamn you.
-Shut up. -Son of a bitch!
Thank you.
Something strange is going on here.
Wh-what do you mean?
I think there's something weird about this setup.
Why are we walking on this street? I wanna know why.
I don't trust the driver, I don't want him to hear what we're saying.
I gotta tell you something...
Don't you realize how ridiculous this looks,
two people walking on the street like this
and the car coming behind?
Has Simon said anything to you?
-About anything? -No. No.
But you know something?
I think I really like Simon...
-You do? -...and he really seems like
he's interested in me, you know?
-That's nice. -Yeah.
I really like him.
Don't start trusting him too much.
To lull the suspicion we just have to keep going like nothing has happened.
-Keep your voice down. -It's probably--
it's probably because of your loudmouth talking.
You probably showed off about the money
either to him or somebody else.
I showed off to nobody. I said nothing to anybody.
Then it's the people we took it from who found us.
Just don't-- don't get too vulnerable.
-Act natural right now, just... -(geese quacking)
(no discernible dialog)
(chuckles)
I wish we were going to California.
You know what I mean? Instead of just, like, to Miami.
Wouldn't it be fun if we-- I mean, just--
I mean, maybe we could all five just keep going and go to California.
What masturbation accomplished for me is that long before I even had sex
I learned how to do it for indefinite periods of time... -Simon: Without masturbation--
...not the problems men have of controlling how long they do it,
so that without even any conscious control
I could do it for any period of time...
Without masturbation, he wouldn't be who he is today.
-It's true. He'd be nobody. -Absolutely. That's true.
Sid: If he didn't masturbate--
Guys, keep it clean back there, all right?
My mother said that when I was a tiny baby,
only a couple of months old, I was lying in her lap
and suddenly I started getting all hot and sweaty and working myself up,
and she got very nervous about it.
She took me to the doctor, and the doctor told her that I was masturbating.
I've done it all my life ever since,
in fact it's been a big lifesaver to me.
I don't know what I would have done without it.
Sure, it's a great activity.
Didn't it give you a real great sense of sexuality?
Sure. I never had a problem with it.
-You were just a little baby? -Simon: I got a great idea.
-Yeah, I've always done it. -Want to pull over now?
-Yeah. -Huh?
You want to masturbate with us?
Take a couple of shots.
We'll all sit down together and do our thing.
First time I did it I was standing up in a barn...
(laughing)
And I didn't know that you were supposed to lie down,
that's why I did it standing up.
What? Oh.
Something I said?
I'm trying to teach everyone how to do it.
I thought I was the only one in the world who knew about this.
-I did teach my friend. -Oh, well, you know--
I taught my friend to masturbate, I did.
-I honestly did. -The amazing thing about me--
-I told him it was my exercises. -I didn't realize--
He caught me and I said, "Oh, I'll teach you this exercise,"
'cause he didn't know what it was. And I said,
"Now these are exercises and you just do them, like, whenever you feel like it."
And then I think later on he found out
that it was masturbating.
Simon: I have an unusual way of doing it.
I did it different than most men,
I rubbed against objects lying down.
Do you still at this age rub against objects?
-Oh, yeah. Absolutely. -Inanimate objects?
That's right, because--
Have you considered yourself a normal human being?
Absolutely. It's the imagination of what I'm thinking about.
-What are you doing with this woman here? -Leona: Why?
Is this as exciting as an object to you, as an inanimate object?
You're the guy who when you have sex with a woman,
you have a masturbatory mentality.
(laughing)
Simon: I've been waiting for lunch for a microcentury.
I'm pretty hungry by now.
A microcentury is approximately 54 minutes.
One millionth of a century.
Jenny: I'm pretty hungry, too.
Simon: You've been waiting perhaps more than a microcentury.
Jenny: I've been waiting all my life for lunch.
-I'm constantly hungry. -(Simon laughing)
Leona: I'd buy some delicatessen and some chocolates,
I get in bed,
and I put this food in like a line
on the bed. I have this section to section to section,
and it works from my head all the way down to my toes,
and then I kind of just reach over
and just kind of eat my food, and it's very fulfilling.
It's almost like having a person next to me in a way.
Jenny: My whole goal in life is to be really skinny.
I still hate myself after every meal,
I still feel disgustingly full and want to eat more.
I asked you not to light up, for God's sake,
not when we're eating dinner.
You blow that stuff at me again--
We should have some--
Put that on the other side. Put it down.
Don't smoke at me.
Keep away from me with that poison stuff of yours.
Why don't you grow up?
-What kind of a device is that? -Grow up?
I'm gonna protect my airspace.
You know you're a very sick guy? Come on, will you, please?
Simon: What a satisfaction I have
getting some of that poison back in your face.
Do you feel good now? Are you happy?
-Simon: Damn right I feel good. -Uh-huh.
You want me to get your jump rope out of the car?
(indistinct chatter)
-(strumming guitar) -New verse.
* Just like a boxer with no black and blues *
* Just like a dancer in a new pair of shoes *
* I'm like a drinker in a fountain of booze *
* Ee-yeah
Bridge.
(Moose vocalizing)
(indistinct chatter)
Leona: I mean, I can't go on the rest of my life just being by myself,
'cause, see, I'm totally confused.
I can't figure out what my relationship with men
is supposed to be anymore.
You're driving me absolutely crazy.
See, I decided that the only way I can survive
is if I am absolutely alone.
See, there's like these deep thoughts inside me, right,
and if I just keep them deep inside me,
and if I don't-- if I don't tamper with them,
if I don't deal with my own loneliness,
I can make a life for myself, and I can be perfectly happy.
Hi.
Hello.
(chiming)
Would you like to have sex with me?
Because if you'd like to, I'd like to have sex with you.
I understand if you don't want to, and that's all right.
But if you'd like to, I think we should get started soon.
What do you say?
I'd like to.
You're a very sweet man.
I think I'm gonna like this a lot.
And you're driving me absolutely crazy.
I mean, on one hand you're so good to me,
and you're making me feel like-- like you accept me, you know.
But on the other hand, I don't think you really know who I am,
and I don't want you to be, um, like,
if you kiss me or if you kind of maybe want to love me,
that doesn't mean that you have to love me for the rest of your life.
I mean, I think I'm driving you crazy.
My daddy left when I was eight. (sniffles)
He left me and my mother just like you're leaving.
(crying)
I'm not leaving, no.
Sure, you're leaving her. Look.
She's just a little girl,
she doesn't know what's going on.
I tell you, I'm not leaving her.
Where are you going on this trip then?
I don't want you to cry.
Where are you going?
I'm just going for a very short trip,
and I'm gonna go back, I'm gonna see her,
and I'm gonna give her everything in the world that I never had,
that I want her to have, that I want you to have.
Don't you understand that?
That's all. That's why I'm doing this.
-(sniffles) -(chiming)
I love to see you smile.
The thing is, I am totally confused.
I mean, I had everything all settled in my mind,
I knew exactly what I wanted to do,
and then you come along and-and all of a sudden
I have these feelings for you, and I absolutely--
I don't even know what I'm gonna do.
I've had these feelings before, they're absolutely terrifying me,
and I want no part of it.
I think we should get started.
There's just one thing.
I don't kiss.
I mean, it sounded like it was a wonderful idea to go on this trip,
to see things, to get away from--
and to do something,
but on the other hand I can't do that.
I can't do that. I mean, I've made a mistake. Here I am.
What am I doing to you? What am I doing to myself?
-So what do you want to do? -I don't know.
What I have to do is, I have to go back to my room I have to pack my things,
I have to thank you for a wonderful time,
and I have to go.
I just have to go. This is-- I've gotta go.
-Wait, wait. Come here. -Okay?
Come here one moment. I want to talk to you for one minute. Just--
-come on. -I can't. I have to go.
(indistinct chatter)
Simon, what's the matter? You having a problem?
I-I can't talk to you right now.
-Hi. -Hi.
Look, do you only talk about sex or do you do it, too?
Do I only-- uh--
Would you, um, like to have sex with me?
Because if you'd like to, I'd love to have sex with you.
Um...
Now, I understand if you don't want to--
No, no, no. I mean, It's very interesting,
and especially when a woman wants to have sex with me,
of course I'd love to have sex with you.
But something else is going on with me right now.
I'm in a very, um--
by the way, I thought you liked Sidney.
-Jenny: Sidney's asleep. -Sidney's asleep?
But if you want to, I think we should try it.
We can stop any time you're not enjoying it.
You're a very sweet man, and I think I'm gonna like this a lot.
(classical score plays)
Simon?
Simon, this is silly.
I can't leave you.
Simon?
I don't believe this.
I'm gettin' out of here. I'm gettin' out of here.
Simon: My keys!
My keys.
Leona! Leona!
-Leona! Leona! -(car engine revving)
(tires squealing)
Please, Leona. Please stop the car!
Leona, please stop the car.
Why did you get in the car?
Leona, what are you doing?
I know exactly what I'm doing. I know what I'm doing.
I'm gonna kill myself.
You don't wanna kill me, do you?
So you want to kill yourself, you don't want to kill me?
Okay, let me get out of the car.
Stop the car. Stop the car.
-(horn blaring) -Will you stop the car?
Slow down. Be careful there! Slow down.
Let me get out of the car and then do what you want.
I am not going to be a victim anymore.
Nobody's victimizing you.
I have all nice feelings towards you.
-(horn honking) -Please, Leona, let me just talk to you.
I can't talk to you this way, because we're both getting killed!
I am gonna have some power.
I didn't do anything, Leona.
So I had a miscellaneous intercourse.
I'm gonna get rid of all the hurt!
I'm gonna get rid of all the pain!
Just stop the car, let us discuss the thing.
(sobbing)
You're gonna get us both killed.
You don't want to kill yourself, and you don't want to kill me.
You're not being made a victim.
(horn blaring)
Everything is gonna be so nice,
so wonderful, and so-- so peaceful.
There isn't any peace in death.
In death, you're just dead.
(horn honking)
Please, please stop the car.
Let's just stop the car and sit and talk.
Afterwards you can do anything you want.
(horn honking)
(tires screeching)
-I tell you, it was the booze, first of all. -(man speaking on TV)
That's all it was, is the booze. It was--
and I want-- I want to hold you,
I want another chance with you.
-Okay? -It's okay. It's okay.
Don't treat me like a fuckin' child, will ya?
I'm not treating you like a child.
Don't worry about it, all right? It isn't important.
-I was-- -It doesn't mean anything.
-Okay. Sure. -It's not important.
Is there a movement within the Orthodox Church?
The women themselves?
No, fortunately enough, we don't have any movement at all
because our people, I guess,
they know very well the theological principles
and they don't ask for it.
Did you ever try to do something like that
to yourself before?
-Yeah. -What'd you do?
Once I, um-- I tried to slit my wrist.
-Really? -Yeah.
But, um, I did it on the wrong side.
I didn't understand how it worked
'cause you see, I have this line here.
And so, um, it seemed like it was easy to do it there
except that I couldn't get the razor to go through it.
-It was the only part. -(laughing)
I mean it. I couldn't get the thing started
'cause there's a bone, you know, and it can't-- mmm.
(Leona moaning)
Man on TV: ...through the theological formulation of the Orthodox Church.
man (on radio): ...currently in Miami right now.
Fair skies, 88 degrees. 89 on the beach.
So this is Miami.
It's supposed to be this great town.
You know, they have recording studios
and all the clubs, you know, the lounges.
If I can get a job in a lounge, I mean, like, somebody might be
coming through and see me or something,
and maybe get a deal.
You know, I'm so completely obsessed with being fat
and with losing weight that I have this feeling
that if I ever succeed,
I'm not gonna know what to be obsessed with next.
I succeeded once before.
And I was real thin, I weighed about 100 pounds.
I was perfectly tan, perfectly thin,
my body was absolutely perfect,
and I realized I had nothing more to do.
I had really reached what I wanted in life,
so it started going away.
There's companies-- record companies right there in Miami.
I can maybe make a deal with a record company right there.
I mean, who knows? Do you know what I mean?
I mean, this could be it.
Moose, pull over here, will you?
Pull over here, will you, please?
I can't believe it anyway, you know,
a sweet girl like you...
doing what you did,
I just can't understand it, you know that?
-Hmm? -What do you mean?
What I mean is going to bed with Simon,
that's what I mean.
Well, you got me started.
Somebody had to get me finished.
It was all that booze. That's why I fell asleep.
I swear to God.
But you didn't have to go to Simon.
I had to find out if Simon's all talk,
and you know what?
-You know what? -Sid: What?
(laughing) Guess.
-Sid: I don't know. What? -He's not.
You're disgusting.
Jesus.
What happened?
Did you-- did you spill it on him?
-Leona: What happened here? -What happened here?
-Are you happy? -(laughing)
What did you do? What did you do?
What happened over there?
We're in Florida. It's time to go swimming.
I'm gonna miss you guys, you know?
I mean, all of you, all four of you. I really...
I love you, do you know what I mean?
I mean, I got real close to all of you. It's like family, you know what I mean?
And I never really had a family.
Leona?
Would you like to have sex with me?
-(laughs) -Because-- shh.
Because if you'd like to, I'd like to have sex with you.
We can talk about it later, all right?
Okay?
-Uh... -We'll talk about it later.
Shh.
You're a very sweet girl,
and I think I'm gonna enjoy it a lot.
(chuckles)
I'd like to keep in touch with you if we could.
You know, I-I don't know where you guys are gonna be.
I love all of you, and--
Sid: We love you too, Moose. It's been wonderful, really.
Okay?
Okay.
(uplifting instrumental music playing)
(man scatting)
(indistinct chatter)
Simon: They didn't touch the tires. They don't know where it is.
Yeah, I'll have another one. Two.
-Same thing? -Yeah.
If they do know, then I'll tell you right now,
that it's all over for us.
Because we're-- we're sitting ducks.
You're right. You're right.
So they don't know, and we gotta keep 'em from knowing
and we gotta keep 'em thinking
that we're staying here a long time and slip out.
So you'll do your job, huh?
You'll come with me, right?
I'll come with you,
but I'm not expert as you are in marksmanship.
I mean, that's your department, that's why they hired you.
This is not a joke. You understand?
-This is not a joke. -Okay.
I know. I take it seriously.
-Lenny, hi, babe, how are you? -How are ya? Good to see ya.
This is the kid I was telling you about, Simon.
-Simon, I heard a lot about you. -Simon, Lenny.
-This is the guy that made it happen. -Yeah?
And this is the guy that got us the sea plane.
Anything you need in Miami, you come and see me.
Because anything you need you got it. Okay?
He'll get you anything you want. He'll get you a broad, anything.
-Okay, okay. -Good friends, all right?
Been a friend a long time.
I gotta go, so I'm gonna catch you later, okay?
Hey, listen, nice to see ya.
Don't think I don't appreciate everything you did.
-Give me a holler. -Sure.
-Okay. bye-bye. -Thanks a lot.
-Beautiful guy. -Who's this guy?
He's the guy who did everything. He had the sea plane and made the arrangements.
What are you starting in front of me,
getting into discussion about "made it possible"?
What do you mean by "made it possible"? What have you told him?
What, are you nuts?
"This is the kid who made it possible," you said about me.
What does that mean? What did I make possible?
He knows you're in the deal. Don't you understand that?
What does he know about the deal?
He knows I made a ripoff, we got some bread.
Baby?
I don't want any more of these assignments,
and I expect you to take care of it
so that I don't have to do it anymore.
(voice breaking) I don't wanna be here. I wanna go home with you now.
Shh. Okay.
-Oh. -What's the matter?
Aw, baby. What are you doing?
-(sobbing) -Shh.
This is just one more day.
You gotta finish this, or they're gonna get very mad.
They're very upset already.
You know what they're like when they're upset.
We don't wanna take any chances.
I promise you.
I promise you this is the last one.
I promise. Okay?
I've never seen you like this before.
He doesn't know where it is.
Doesn't know? Did you tell him--
He knows nothing about it, okay?
Hey, remember me?
-Hey. Sure. Wonderful. -Up there, Wilmington, the Holiday Inn.
-Great. -By the way, I'm Gene.
-You're Sidney, right? -Right. How are you?
-Simon? -Yeah.
I'm just playing some more guitar with Moose over here.
What are you doing here if you were in Wilmington?
Moose told me you guys were coming down here,
we play together a lot, and it sounded real good.
So I thought, "What the hell, I'll go to Miami."
Find out every piece of information you can.
Find out where the money is tonight.
-Don't just nod. Listen to me. -I will.
Find out where the money is,
find out where the plane is gonna land.
You understand?
You tell Leona that you're gonna let her escape.
You tell her that you're gonna let her go with them.
Do I have to kill Leona, too?
Yes, you have to kill Leona, too.
Okay, I will.
-Why do you ask me that? -I will do it!
Shut up.
Why do you even asking that?
Because I've worked with her a long time,
and I've wondered if what you've heard about her is true.
Of course it's true.
We know these things.
She hasn't done her job.
-You're hurting me. -I'm sorry, baby.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, sweetheart.
It's only that I'm concerned for you.
I don't want them to take care of you.
I don't want you to tell them that I said this to you.
I won't tell them anything. Of course I won't.
There's no choice. You know them.
You remember what happened to Irene?
They don't fuck around.
So don't you fuck around, okay, baby?
-Okay. -Okay, baby.
I've missed you, you know?
-Have you? -Uh-huh.
Gene: Where's he going?
I don't know where he's going but I know
he laid a lot of bread on the pilot,
so he's probably gonna go a long way from here.
-Oh, yeah? -Yeah.
Where are they picking him up?
They are picking him up on the West Coast
on a beach called Bonita Springs.
I think that's just north of Naples and south of Fort Myers.
Listen to me, I can't cover for you anymore.
I don't know what you're doing. You're acting strange.
You're getting involved with this guy.
I can't cover for you!
Leona: They care about us. They care about us.
They don't care about us. You have to know that.
You start thinking they care about us,
you're really gonna be screwed up.
Leona: Jenny, do you ever think about
just what's gonna happen when you die, do you?
You don't have to live forever. You can die now.
You could die right now. You wanna die now?
-No. -(laughing)
I know you wouldn't let me die.
Jenny: Are you becoming emotionally involved with this man?
-You can tell me. Come on. -Leona: No.
No. I mean, I like him, he kinda makes me laugh
and he's kind of like a very odd kind of character.
I've never met anyone like him before.
Yeah, but I see something happening with you two.
I see a look in your eyes that I haven't seen before.
No, no.
Listen, it seems that they're getting
a little bit not sure about you specifically.
-Leona: Of me? -Jenny: Yes.
Leona: Did you tell them how well I'm doing,
that he's a very difficult kind of character?
Jenny: I know you're doing very well.
Leona: We've never had a guy like that before.
Jenny: Look, look, look.
Hello, Daddy. This is Simon.
I just didn't have a chance to call for a few days.
I've been busy, and I've had a very irregular schedule.
I just want to explain to you
that I've gotta go out of town for a while.
In fact, I have to go out of the country for a few days.
Jenny: People are such idiots.
You know that enlightened people--
enlightened men know that they're gonna die
nine months before they die.
Enlightened men?
Well, I hope I'm never enlightened,
'cause I don't wanna know when I'm gonna die.
No?
I just want it to happen quick, no pain.
Just go out. Lights go out.
Why don't you go back to New York tonight?
I have a funny kind of premonition.
I don't think it's good for you to be here.
I don't know if you believe in premonitions.
-Do you? -Sometimes.
Well, then go back to New York tonight, okay?
Want to come with me?
No, I can't come with you, but I want you to go back.
I'm not going anywhere without you.
I want you to know that. I told you that before.
I really want you to be happy.
I'll give you anything in the world,
but you must come with me.
I want you to know that. Don't be afraid.
Okay? Let me see you smile.
Smile, baby, please.
-Bubblegum. -Bubblegum?
Jeez. I'll get you bubblegum, too.
I'll get you anything.
Cracker Jacks?
Tiny Tears?
Poor Pitiful Pearl?
Sid: I'll get you all of that.
(laughs)
Sid: I wish that you were always like this, you know?
I love you.
Daddy, I don't have to report
every little detail to you like I'm a little boy.
I'm calling you, I do call you all the time.
I didn't have a chance,
I have a very good reason why I'm going.
Yeah, I'm supposed to be going.
It's part of what I'm doing, it's good for me to go,
and I'll let you know as soon as I come back.
In any event I'll call you in a couple of days
wherever I am.
Sid: Not a big hotel, mind you.
Nothing really lavish but something special.
Something that you'll enjoy in Costa...
Bravo.
-(laughing) -Costa Sierra.
Costa Novelle.
Costa Bazoule.
* But you know in Costa Bravo *
* And it's the time to say to you... *
(indistinct chatter)
Simon: Listen, I'm getting nervous here
because it's very loud around here,
we got loudmouth types, and all the smoking.
I've gotta go out for a walk now.
-All right. I'll go with you. -No, no, no, I just--
-No. -No, listen to me a moment.
I just have to go for a walk for a little while.
I'll be back. Just please stay here. I gotta go.
-You don't want any company? -No, no.
I have to go for a walk, and then I'll go up with you.
Just wait here for me, please? Please just stay here and wait for me, okay?
-Ah. -And you, shut up.
No talk. Keep quiet.
-Okay? -Okay, okay.
Bartender? Bar-- bar lady?
Bar lady?
-Joannie. -Joannie.
Joannie.
Joannie, could you come over here a second?
I just want to give you this,
because I have a lot of them, I think you're so sweet,
and I want you to buy everybody in the whole bar
a drink and tell 'em it's from Sid.
(ambient music playing)
The clitoris is the only organ that exists purely for pleasure
and has no other function.
The only physiological organ that exists
purely for pleasure in any mammal.
Why aren't you getting undressed?
I don't understand why we're not sleeping in the same bed.
I wanna be with you.
Do me a favor, just stay over there.
I wanna be with you.
Please trust me.
Please just stay there just for tonight
and get some rest now.
I'm gonna fly with you
in the most gorgeous plane you ever saw.
I have my own plane, you know.
You have a private plane?
I have a beautiful plane.
And you're flying tomorrow?
No, we're flying tomorrow.
No, I'm not going.
(chuckles)
You gotta go.
I like talking to you in the dark.
Makes me feel safe.
We've got a big day tomorrow.
Everything depends upon tomorrow.
I feel safe for the first time in my life.
With you.
I feel very good with you, too.
I'm gonna own Central America,
then I'll be in a position to negotiate with the United States.
I will be a world power.
You are a world power, you poor thing.
Hot cereal was the only thing I ever lied to my father about.
He made me eat it for breakfast,
because he thought it was healthy.
It tasted so disgusting to me, I couldn't stand it.
I flushed it down the toilet, I couldn't tell it to him, and I lied to him.
I never lied to him about anything big or small,
I never lied to my father about anything.
Until now.
("Rock-a-bye Baby" chiming)
I'll meet you in Costa Rica, okay?
Well-- well--
-Okay? -Okay, but I wish--
Shh.
(door opens, closes)
You got the keys, Moose?
I wanna tell you I wanna thank you very much.
You've been really beautiful all the way.
You did everything you were supposed to do.
-Here's your guitar. -Thank you.
Now I wanna give you your bread.
Okay.
I owe you a thousand bucks, is that right?
Yeah.
We're just gonna ride, that's all.
We're just gonna take a little bit of a ride.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
That's the thousand I owe you, right?
Right.
And here's a kiss goodbye for you.
One, two, three, four, five.
I wanna I wish you a lot of luck.
-You've been fantastic. -That's wonderful.
Okay, you did the right thing. That's it.
Good luck, go get 'em, give 'em hell.
And I know you're gonna make it,
'cause you've really been beautiful. I appreciate it.
Where would I write you if I wanted to drop you a line?
You don't have to write me,
'cause I'm gonna tell you something.
You're gonna be visible, you're gonna be a big star,
-and I'm gonna find you. -Would you find me?
-I haven't bullshitted you yet, have I? -No.
-Everything I said came true? -Everything.
Well, you watch and see.
One day you're gonna be singing and swinging,
and I'm gonna show up and say, "Moose, hiya, Moose."
I love you.
Me too. Take care of yourself.
-Enjoy yourself. -Okay.
Go ahead and do it.
Give 'em hell, man, give 'em hell.
Do you want the hat?
-You keep the hat. Okay? -Okay.
-That's your hat. Remember-- -I love you.
Thank you very much.
Okay, see you later.
-Where can I-- -Go get 'em.
I can't write you anywhere?
I'll be there, just remember that.
When you make it, I'll be there.
-Okay. Okay. -Okay.
-Go ahead. Give 'em hell. -Okay.
-You got it. Go ahead. -Okay.
-Right. Bye-bye, pal. -Okay.
I have something that is very difficult for me to tell you,
and I want you to prepare yourself for this.
It's very important that you understand
that what I'm going to tell you is from the past.
The guy kept asking me, all the time,
all he wanted to know was where he could write to me.
The man's a-- the man's a freak.
This is what I do for a living.
I kill people.
All those questions, "Where you going?
How you feeling? When are you gonna be there?"
You kill people?
I kill people.
Right on time. Come on, smooth baby, let's go.
Is that something to do with--
I make my living by killing people.
Is that something to do with your being here?
It has nothing to do with my being here
that you have to be concerned about.
I'm comin' home, Mama.
The organization has known about your plans from the beginning,
from the day that you called off the collections.
They let you go through with it because they couldn't believe
that there was only the two of you involved.
The only thing no one discovered was where the money is.
I was assigned to find the money you took
and then to kill you.
Jenny and I work together. We're a team. We're hitwomen.
The only way I will be free of my other life
is to go with you to Costa Rica.
Can I?
Jenny will let us go.
She'll blame it all on me after we're gone.
Can I come with you?
Everything I said came true, right?
Everything I did, perfect.
That's the way it works. It works right for me.
I remember dreaming about far away places
and I never had the balls to say maybe it could be me.
(tires screech)
Come on. Let's get the tires off the car and ready for the plane.
(jazz music playing)
Simon: We can't raise it high enough.
-We gotta back it up! -At least get the tires off!
No, no, no! To get it off, we gotta back it up.
Get it outta here! Go ahead.
Push the thing, will ya?
Simon: Why did you drive over the sand?
Sid: Push!
I'm pushing, you ass, but it's stuck here!
There's the goddamn plane!
Will you push this son of a bitch!
Push it! Push it!
(engine revving)
-Let's go! -(man speaks indistinctly on radio)
Sid: Push it!
Simon: Get out of here! Get out!
Sid: What's she doing?
For God's sake, what is she doing?
Simon, Sidney, behind me.
(gun cocks)
What's going on? What are you doing?
(gunfire)
Okay, let's go.
Sid: I want that money!
I'm not gonna leave without it!
I want that money!
(gunfire)
The bastards. I'll kill the bastards!
I want my money!
Simon: Get in that plane.
-(gunfire) -I want my money!
(gunfire)
Hey, pull him in! Pull him in!
Sid: Those fuckin' thieves!
-Simon: Let's go, let's go! -Sid: They're all thieves.
Simon: What, are you crazy? Stop fighting here.
Sid: I'll jump out and kill the bastards!
(gunfire)
All that work for nothing.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
(gunfire continues)
Simon: I got the money.
Sid: What do you mean you got the money?
Simon: I've got it! I've got it! I got the money.
-Sid: You got the money? -Simon: I got the money.
-Sid: Where? -Simon: Right on me.
I got the money! I got it!
How do you like that?
-Sid: You son of a bitch! -(women cheering)
Simon: I didn't trust the situation.
Too many things were going wrong.
You were shooting off your loud mouth, getting drunk at the bar,
everything else that happened, I left at that time--
What do you think I did when I left?
I'm sorry, that's why I couldn't be with you last night.
Sid: We're rich! Look at us!
Oh, I don't believe it!
-Mwah! (laughs) -Ugh!
Give me a kiss!
-(screaming) -(laughing)
Sid: And you know because of you we're rich!
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Oh, we're rich!
-Yay! -Wait a minute.
I'm the one who's rich or at least reasonably well off.
You haven't got a cent.
Those were my two back tires. I wouldn't take your tires.
You didn't take all the money?
No, I took my two back tires.
You didn't take all the money?
I took my two back tires.
What, are you crazy?
Why didn't you take all the money?
How could I take your money?
-I wouldn't take your money. -This is our money.
I took my two back tires, but don't worry.
I'll help you, I'll support you, I'll give you $150 a week.
No limousines for you.
I'm gonna take this $375,000,
I'm gonna make it $375 million!
I'm gonna make you so goddamn rich!
Stay with me!
I'm gonna change your life. Believe me.
You give me that money,
and you'll never have another worry again!
-(jazz music plays) -Man: * Oh yeah
(man scatting)
* Just like a breeze blowing your hair *
* Flying you this way, set you down there *
* I ain't got a worry, I ain't got a care *
* Oh yeah
(scatting)
* Just like a pair of sitting ducks in the air *
* Flying away from the duck hunter's snare *
* I ain't gonna worry, and I ain't gonna care *
* Oh yeah
(scatting)
(music fading)